Got a crazy ass story to share? Think you can do better than us? Then, write for us! Drop us a line at editor@gettingdrunkinfirstclass.com.

Footprints in the Sand

Published on November 13, 2007 by mensamember
By A. Client

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach
with the Partner.
Many scenes from my project flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed
that during the crunch times of my project,
when we were suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to the Partner,
“You promised me Martin,
that if I hired you,
you would walk with us always.
But I have noticed
that during the most trying periods of my project
there have only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when we needed you most,
have you not been there for us?”

The Partner replied,
“The times when you have seen
only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I backed out our expenses
because things got out of control
at a team outing.”



11 Responses to “Footprints in the Sand”

  1. SarbOxConsultant Says:


    Visit SarbOxConsultant

    …that’s the new background on my desktop. Hilarious! Thanks!

  2. People Over Process » links for 2007-11-15 Says:


    Visit People Over Process » links for 2007-11-15

    [...] Getting Drunk in First Class ยป Footprints in the Sand by For those who enjoy Footprints in the Sand jokes. (tags: footprints consulting) [...]

  3. New BTA Says:


    Visit New BTA

    I am embarrassed to be a consultant when garbage like this is posted. Not one post on this site is even comparable to anything on ‘leveragedsellout’. Just take the site down and stop kidding yourselves.

    Posting receipts without showing totals? Who gives a s***? Does anything fun actually happen when ‘things get out of control at a team outing’? Why don’t we talk about that instead of constantly implying we spend money…

  4. NotImpressed Says:


    Visit NotImpressed

    I agree, this site is terrible. I bet you try so hard to glorify roll offs because you’re old and have no friends or money of your own. You’re a joke.

  5. consultantguy Says:


    Visit consultantguy

    You probably shouldn’t use ‘BTA’. It gives us a pretty idea who you work for dot

  6. Consulting Veteran Says:


    Visit Consulting Veteran

    Don’t you people understand that this is satire? The point is that it is a joke as an outlet to reality. They are joking about everything they say! In reality, they are sharing a team rental car on a local project and burning the midnight oil. The receipts shown are likely getting picked up by their FIRM, not the client. Just learn how to take yourselves a little less seriously…

  7. Scott McArthur Says:


    Visit Scott McArthur

    Love it. Good to see a fellow consultant out there!

  8. consultingjackass Says:


    Visit consultingjackass

    Dear Veteran,

    Thanks for clearing up the difference between the firm picking up the tab and the client picking up. I didn’t know that professional services firms had phantom revenue streams that did not involve a client source.

    By the way, I am currently on a PUBLIC SECTOR project (admittedly, it’s big) and even we routinely have pretty respectable receipts (picked up by client directly, not the firm). Perhaps you should move on from your position at Joe’s Consulting Shack.

  9. TypeAConsulting Says:


    Visit TypeAConsulting

    I still can’t believe people think this site is supposed to be non-fiction. Guys, this site is supposed to be a joke, it’s a fucking mockery of the consulting profession. Try laughing at yourself a little more and take it easy. Now move on and go get your MBA’s.

  10. my12inch Says:


    Visit my12inch

    someone posted with a word BTA. dumbass. i bet you dont have that ivy League degree under ur belt

  11. ThanksJackass Says:


    Visit ThanksJackass

    Dear Veteran / TypeA:

    Stop “not-getting” the posts.

    Veteran: everyone understands the satire - BUT - the satire sucks. That’s the point. It’s not actually funny. This poem is stupid, and not worth reading.

    TypeA: The best parts of the site are non-fiction - actual CLM’s, horror travel stories, and open bar mishaps are priceless. Everyone would laugh at themselves and their professions IF something funny is ever posted again.

    I’d also like to take the chance to thank Mensamember for V-BIT. That was a wonderful, slightly exaggerated piece of non-fiction we can all relate to.

    And finally, to my12inch - you don’t know what you’re talking about. Why don’t you shove your imaginary cornell degree up your arse?